Caro’s Ramblings

Lessons Learned

It’s been a while since I last blogged (what else is new? lol). Since my last post, quite a lot has happened. I moved, I attended my bridal shower and bachelorette parties, and I dealt with all kinds of wedding stuff (see previous post).

Lots and lots of life lessons have happened along the way, some big some small. Among them:

*Rooms look smaller when they are empty. J and I were seriously wondering how in the world we would fit a kind sized bed in our new bedroom. Turns out you can likely fit a second one in there with NO problem. Lesson: Always bring a measuring tape to a new apartment

*I’ve been trying to eat healthier. This includes making salads at home. I discovered that I absolutely LOVE pear salads, so I’ve been buying the ingredients to make them at home. However, the dressing can be a ton of calories, and feta cheese isn’t exactly the lowest calorie food either. So I’ve been buying the reduced fat versions. Still super tasty! But then I made the mistake of buying reduced fat (2%) cheddar cheese for my sandwiches. It’s disgusting. Lesson: Most reduced fat things actually are gross, especially cheeses. Use caution when buying, and buy the small pack the first time, just in case it’s gross! I now have a gigantic pack of lowfat cheese that will most certainly find its way to the garbage.

*No matter how much planning you do, when the word “wedding” is included in said plans, something will go awry. Another example: our chuppah rental fell through 44 days before the wedding. Hooray! Now we’re 22 days out and still don’t quite have one. It will get done, but still. Lesson: Be flexible.

*Driving to and from the bachelorette party took a crazy amount of time. 9.5 hours to get there, almost 10 to get back. Why? Because traffic sucks. And they’re doing construction on the 5. When it says “I-5 reduced to one lane 30 miles ahead, consider alternate route”, one really should consider alternate routes (which ones, I’m not sure, but maybe one exists?), especially when that sign is followed by another that says “expect 1 hour delay”. Lesson: Leave at 3am or avoid driving altogether. Airfare = worth it!

*My boss’s daughter is training a puppy to be a service dog. However, she’s currently interning this summer, so while she’s working down the street she leaves the dog here. The dog has learned the sound of the door and knows it’s an opportunity to escape. A few days ago he got out and ran down the hall. My boss then chased after the dog, and I couldn’t stop laughing. Lesson: When your boss brings a puppy to work 3 days a week, prepare to just sit back and laugh.

*I have a coworker that is probably just overworked, but it really causes a lot of errors. Major errors. I now have a couple of situations that are causing me a ton of work to fix. Lesson: When this particular person says she’ll handle it, don’t trust her. Do it yourself from the beginning.

 

 

 

Posted by Caro in Life, Weddings, Work

I Know Why The Government Is Broke

I discovered today why the government has no money. It’s because services such as the United States Postal Service are grossly incompetent. It’s actually kind of comical. Let me tell you about my wedding invitations….

I have 135 wedding invitations and my dad volunteered to mail them for me. Score! He had one envelope weighed, bought postage for each one, and had them hand-canceled. Once all 135 envelopes were stamped and canceled, my dad gave them to the post master and went on his day.

This was Saturday, 8 days ago. Tuesday rolled around and no one received an invitation. OK maybe it took a day longer. No biggie. Wednesday, I’m freaked out. Re-ordering will cost a lot of money, not to mention the time commitment in redoing each of these damn invitations. Thursday, Friday, Saturday. NO INVITATIONS. Not one person has received them. WHAT is happenening?

It should also be noted that I moved this week. I still have the keys to the old place, but never go there, except today to clean. We turned in our keys and the oddest thing happened – we had a package. I didn’t order anything to be shipped here – what could this be? The guy got the box and it looked oddly familiar. It also did not seem to be well-taped. Basically it was a janky looking box that, were it something I ordered from a company, I would have called the company to tell them their packaging blows.

I checked where it came from – the return address said it was from our wedding stationery company. WHAT in the fuck – we have ordered nothing from these people since we ordered extra invitations. Wait a minute….I put the 135 addressed envelopes in this box that I gave to my dad to mail. Could these be the invitations?

Yes.

I opened the box, and there are 135 invitations staring up at me. Address and stamp side up, ready to be taken from the box and sent to their respective destinations. Instead, they are in a box in my hands.

So this is what happened: My dad went to give the post master the invitations. He started pulling them out of the box to give her. She said, “No, leave them in the box. They’ll fit in my cart easier.” So he folded the flaps inward and gave her the whole box. Then some incompetent asshole at the post office came upon this box, saw the envelopes with the stamps and addresses face up, and decided to pull the flaps out of the box, seal it with tape and put it on the conveyor belt. Um, no. This is not right.

The best part of this is that it went to my (now former) home address. None of the invitations were addressed to that location, and the return address is a different one altogether. Basically, they sent it to the address on the label on the box, WHICH WAS A LABEL FROM FEDEX!! The label didn’t even belong to their company, thus they received NO money for this transaction.  Could they be any more incompetent? I don’t think so. I mean, I’m 100% stoked on life that I don’t have to pay a couple hundred dollars for more invitations, nor do I have to experience the soul-killing process of addressing and stuffing invitations again, but for this to be the reason just absolutely kills me.

Question: they are all post-marked for over a week ago. They’re also canceled, meaning the stamp isn’t reusable. Am I going to have a problem when I bring my invitations (sans box) to the post office tomorrow? Cuz if that’s the case some poor postal worker is going to get an earful.

 

 

 

Honestly, This Is The Best Thing I’ve Ever Seen

No joke, I love penguins so much that I could watch this video on loop for days.

It’s seriously the single most awesome thing I’ve ever seen. Enjoy!

penguins jumping on an iceberg

Posted by Caro in Animals, Discoveries, Videos

A Serious Dilemma

As I address the invitations to my wedding, I find myself with a dilemma: Do I invite the father of my niece?

I had always said that I would consider inviting him so long as my sister did not have a new boyfriend at the time of the wedding. Why? Baby Daddy will start a fight, and I don’t need that on my wedding day.

And now here I am 64 days from my wedding with a very single sister. I have no problems with this guy. I mean he hasn’t worked in 6 years, contributes $0 to my sister or my niece, and is incredibly immature regarding when he’ll “babysit” his child, but I have accepted these shortcomings and they don’t bother me anymore. It’s just the way things are.

Actually over the years, I’ve realized I share common interests with him. Things are amicable. And he’s in my niece’s life forever, therefore also in my life forever. I feel like I should invite him to my wedding considering this information. No problem right?

Nope, my sister and my mother object to his presence. I can understand why my sister – who is also my maid of honor – doesn’t want him there. He does add unnecessary challenges to her every day life. My mom brings up other points. I have to admit I believe her opinion is biased. I mean, he did knock up her teenaged daughter and doesn’t contribute money to raise her, leaving my mom is responsible for helping my sister financially when he should be. I understand the resentment. The other reasons she lists are also somewhat valid:

*Dude doesn’t have a car or a drivers license. How will he get to the wedding? My first reaction is to say “That’s not my problem.” I have plenty of friends and family coming from all over and aside from providing suggestions for hotels, I am leaving their arrangements completely up to them. Baby Daddy is a 30-something year old grown man. He should be able to figure out how to get there on his own. In actuality, he will probably beg and pester my sister and/or our dad. My dad will end up having to pick him up, and I will require my dad to be at my beck and call on my wedding day. Sorry for being selfish, it’s my wedding.

*Dude has nowhere to stay. While the wedding isn’t that far away, it’s also not down the street. My family is staying at a hotel that night and certainly will not either take him home or let him crash with us. Even if he wants to get a room, he has no money. My sister has no money to give him, nor should she, and then he might pester my parents to put him up somewhere.

*There still is a (small) chance he will make a scene. I’m pretty confident he won’t, but give anyone a few drinks and an ex-girlfriend and I’m sure words will be exchanged. My sister has maid of honor jobs to do (like calm me down if I freak out) so I can’t have her being all uppity over something. I also want her to have fun.

So that’s the situation. I’m mailing invitations in a week. Does Baby Daddy get one???

 

 

Posted by Caro in Family, Weddings

Annual Domestic Trip #3

It’s pretty well known I enjoy traveling to random foreign places. I love seeing new things and new cultures, and recently have started enjoying new cuisines as well. What I’ve been neglecting is the large majority of the country where I live. To make things right, I’ve started making a point of going sightseeing in one new US city each year. So far I’ve seen New York and Austin. And now we can add Chicago to the list. I’ve been there already (in the dead of winter mind you), but my travel buddy had not. So off to Chicago we went!

First and foremost, I’m so used to taking quick trips within my home state that I’ve gotten too used to packing only basics. One thing I forgot: MY CAMERA. How does one go on a sightseeing adventure without a camera!? Thankfully smartphones are now equipped with pretty decent cameras, so the trip wasn’t ruined. I also bought a Kodak FunSaver, but ended up not using it. LOL memories!

Chicago is totally different when it’s not cold and snowy, and I enjoyed it even more than the first trip. We stayed at a super nice hotel, which always makes traveling that much better. Highlight of the hotel: morning coffee. They brought me a full coffee press! SWEET! On day one we just strolled around the Magnificent Mile. We also indulged in Giordano’s Chicago Pizza. I am not joking when I say that I’ve been craving more of this pizza since the last time I visited Chicago, and it sure didn’t disappoint!

Other highlights of the trip included the Taste of Chicago Food Festival and seeing various museums and the zoo. The Taste of Chicago was absolutely wonderful, and I am proud to say I stuffed my face. Everything was delicious. I don’t feel bad though, considering I walked at least 15 miles over the course of the weekend. Whew! We saw the Field Museum of Natural History, which I hadn’t gone into last trip. It’s really interesting. The museum spent $8.4 million on the purchase of “Sue“, the largest T-Rex ever discovered. I also got to see Buckingham Fountain in all its glory (it obviously wasn’t turned on over the winter), Navy Pier, and took a trip to the top of Willis Tower. Glad I got to see these the second time around!

Here’s some of the highlights in pictures:

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Posted by Caro in Funny Signs, Travel and tagged with

Anthony Weiner, Part II

OK so I’m clearly REALLY late in posting this, but whatever.

A while back I posted a blog about how much I <3 Anthony Weiner. I meant to link it into my Twitter. My overall goal was for Rep. Weiner to follow me back on Twitter. Not the biggest of goals, but I hoped it would happen. However, after I made the post I totally forgot to mention it on Twitter.

Begin Weiner scandal. I hear that some of the people he sent pics to are people who wrote about him in their blogs and/or started direct messaging him through Twitter. I can’t help but think that if I had actually remembered to Tweet my post that I might have been graced with some of these illicit photos. Not that I want to see the man without clothes, but it would have been kind of awesome to be part of that small group. LOL

Anyway, now he’s no longer in congress or on Twitter for my entertainment. I didn’t get pics. I didn’t get a follow back. And all of these combined make me a sad panda.

 

Posted by Caro in Blogging, Politics, Rants and raves

3 Months

OMG I’m getting married in 3 months. SO. MUCH. TO. DO!

I don’t know if I’ve already mentioned this, but we also found out we need to move. And by that I mean we learned of a 12% increase in our rent. Screw that!

The apartment hunt was something I wanted to get over and done with quickly, but that just added stress. In the end I think we picked the right place. I feel comfortable there, it’s not too much of a down grade from the amazing place we have now, and we are saving an incredible amount of money. Oh and we didn’t have to move too terribly far (maybe 5 miles?). Not bad.

And now to focus on the wedding. And packing/picking a moving company. But mostly the wedding. This weekend I hope to have purchased our wedding rings, politely bitch out the caterers, and get some documents done. Within the next two weeks I need to deal with linen rentals, finalize groomsmen attire, start working with the offiiant to create the ceremony (seriously HOW does one fill 15 minutes???), and finalize picture selections for various things that require pictures.

Oh and I’m changing up my work a bit, just to add some complexity to an already overly complex situation. My head very well may explode.

Weeeeeee!

 

Posted by Caro in Life, Things to do, Weddings, Work

Way Too Busy

When did my life become crazy? I mean I’m “used to” the working 3 jobs thing or the working 2 jobs and going to school thing. So why is working 2 jobs + planning a wedding + dealing with daily life so much more complicated than either of those other scenarios?

I think it all went to shit when I attended my cousin’s wedding two weeks ago. Don’t get me wrong – it was AWESOME. But their ceremony and reception were strikingly similar to what I’m envisioning in my head and it made me realize exactly how much I still have to do to pull it off and how little time I have left. I came home and had a mini panic attack. I mean I have all the major details worked out. The venues and vendors are set. The flowers are picked. The general “flow” of the ceremony and reception are laid out.

But then there’s all these details:

What color table cloths do I want? It comes with ivory, but I could add a sheer overlay in another color, or I could use the ivory tablecloth and get colored napkins. The centerpieces are white so I can’t do JUST ivory, but if we want something else we have to find a rental company.

What song will the bridal party walk into at the ceremony? For that matter, who is walking in when and with whom?

What exactly will our 15 minute ceremony consist of? 15 minutes is a really short amount of time, but when you are starting with ZERO ideas it’s a long fucking time to fill.

As always, I calmed myself down by making a list. A nice little to-do list that I can check things off of. It’s so much better when you can see all the things you have to do in one clearly organized place.

But then life happens and gets in the way of serenity. The day after I made my list I learned my rent is going up 12%. Yep I’m gonna have to move. Oh and the best part? The last day of my lease is the day after my cousin’s (out of town) wedding, which is the weekend after I’m hosting my in-laws for my bridal shower. FML.

 

 

Posted by Caro in Life, Rants and raves, Weddings, Work

Once Broken, Always Broken

Remind me to never break anything again.

I’m at a complete loss as to why my broken finger is now “healed” but still won’t bend all the way. I still can’t make a fist and it hurts like hell. Oh and since I started trying to bend it/make fists it’s started getting swollen again. What in the world is going on here?

I think it’s true what they say – broken bones are NEVER the same again.

My doctor recommended physical therapy. I laughed. For a pinky finger? That’s ridiculous. That said, I’m starting to consider it….

Anyone ever broken anything? Please tell me it gets better!

Posted by Caro in Health

I (heart) Anthony Weiner

It’s pretty well known that I enjoy Anthony Weiner. In fact, I would consider moving to New York just to be in his congressional district. Why? Cuz he’s funny. He says what’s on his mind, and doesn’t let other people bully him. Regardless of your political beliefs, it’s pretty clear that absolutely nothing is getting accomplished by the government these days, and Rep. Weiner provides me with the entertainment I need to keep from going crazy because of the government’s dysfunction.

Here are some classic examples of Weiner in action:

1. Without a doubt, this is my favorite. House Mouse, Senate Mouse. This was in response to a newly elected representative trying to circumvent the policies for how bills get passed. (Jump to 1:48 if you don’t have 3 minutes)

2. My first introduction to Rep. Weiner was his classic rant related to the Republicans blocking the vote on the 9/11 First Responders Bill. He’s pissed. “THE GENTLEMAN WILL SIT!” (Like I said, if nothing is going to get accomplished in Congress, at least I’m getting my money’s worth in entertainment value!)

3. “Half-Time” report on the attempt to repeal healthcare. Again, if nothing is getting done, the commentary might as well be good.

4. My second favorite. I saved it for last because it’s long, but I promise it’s worth 12 minutes of your life. Dude roasts himself at the Correspondent’s Dinner.

Follow him @RepWeiner. Why? To see the “’70s Jew Fro” of course!

Posted by Caro in Hilarious, Politics, Videos