I work in research. Every now and again, I try to “give back” to my research community. Mostly these are selfish endeavors, in that I do one study over another because I get paid. Well last week a paid research opportunity presented itself to me, so I jumped on it.
It was an MRI study. Get paid like $50 to get a 30 min MRI done. Sounds easy enough right? Well the problem with this is that you can’t bring metal into the MRI room. If you have a metal object, like say a piercing, lodged somewhere in you, it will certainly be ripped out. Painfully and traumatically. I knew this going into it, but figured I’d be fine.
I’ve had my cartilage pierced for like 9 years. Not a single problem with it. It should also be noted that I have never once attempted to remove it. I’m not even sure how to remove it.
Turns out this is quite a problem when you’re trying to get an MRI. After struggling blindly with it for about 5 minutes, I asked the (male) researcher to help me. He’s a clean cut kinda guy, so he had NO clue how to do this. He fumbled around for about 10 minutes before asking me to try again. No luck. Called up a female coworker who has a daughter with piercings. She fumbled around for about 10 minutes. We had gotten it unscrewed, at least we thought (and I still think it’s unscrewed), but still no luck getting it out. I’m not sure how it got in – 3 people can’t get a small piece of metal out of an ear?? I should also mention that neither of these other people washed their hands before manhandling my ear/earring. Awesome.
40 minutes later, we gave up. No MRI, no money.
I went home and realized that my ear hurt a bit. I showed J and he noticed a “scab”. Of course given its location combined with my lack of vision made it impossible for me to see. I asked a female friend with numerous piercings and tattoos, and my suspicions were confirmed: I had developed a keloid. 9 years into a flawless, happy, healthy piercing, and I just developed a keloid. FUCK.
I went to a piercing place to have them change the earring. I mean, it’s kind of retarded that I can’t take it out. Let’s get something else in there already! The piercer wasn’t in, but the lady at the counter told me to go to the pharmacy and get Hebicleanse. Use it twice a day and the keloid should clear up.
I’m day 3 of this, and this morning part of it came off in my hand. Extremely disgusting, but definitely fulfilling. Now to get the other half. I’m using this Hebiclense religiously and crossing my fingers, and thinking good thoughts. All the help I can get right! Pray for me that it works. I can NOT lose this piercing, especially over something so damn stupid as a failed attempt at making a few bucks. SO LAME.
I’ve learned my lesson. Can my ear just get better now? 
